Tuesday, 6 October 2015

The ball of ear-wax incident.

My ears produce a lot of ear-wax.

A lot, and by a lot I mean I can get a q-tip full from each ear every day.

My ears produce so much ear-wax that often the pressure in my head forces the ear-wax to fall out naturally - it is expelled as it were.

Very often this happens as I walk along and causes no offence.

A while ago however some ear-wax appeared in less acceptable circumstances.

In a meeting in fact with my boss.

I'd not been working at this place for long when this happened:

Just me and her, we were chatting away about something or another and all of a sudden I felt my right ear pop, felt a very gentle tap on my shoulder as the rea-wax hit and then saw to my dismay the ball of ear-wax land on the table between us!

The ball of ear-wax was the size of my pinkie finger nail to give this some perspective, so easily spotted and very dark brown.

I tried not to notice but she had, and being naturally confrontational we had this conversation:

Confrontational Boss: What is that!
Peter: Ear-wax.
CB: Sorry?
Peter: Ear-wax.
CB: Where did it come from?
Peter: My right ear.
CB: Your right ear?
Peter: Yes! My right ear.
CB (looking somewhat peaky by this stage): How.
Peter: It just fell out, it happens all of the time.
CB (who by now was reduced to repeating virtually everything I said) It just fell out?
Peter: Yes. Shall I remove it?
CB: Yes please.

The meeting didn't last for much longer, I think she may have puked.

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