Has it really come to this?

I have for many years tried to stay loyal to Costa, ignoring the blind stupidity of their staff and putting up with the appalling service, all down to the quality of their coffee.

Well, because Costa is owned by careless buffoons who don't give a shit about their customer, and who only care about spreadsheets, they have buggered that one totally. No doubt in order to save money, they have changed their roast and now their coffee is as bitter as hell. I am sure that the cretinous accountant who had the idea to save money is pleased with himself, but in truth he'd be better off in prison.

So, with the quality of the coffee gone down the shitter, I have forsaken Costa and turned to the arch enemy of the coffee world, Starbucks!

Now in truth, the staff at Starbucks are really no better than the divs at Costa, their coffee however is, at least presently, much better.

I must say that an incident today has shown up, for me at least, one of the major differences between the two organisations. And this is probably down to the location, and therefore mindset, of the HQ operations of each company. Whitbread, who own Costa, are headquartered in Luton. If you have ever been to Luton you'll know what I mean. Their basic customer service ethic is "fuck you" and their basic approach to quality is based on being in Luton. Frankly if you think that an HQ in Luton is a good idea, you are the easyjet equivalent of the coffee world.

I do not know where Starbucks is headquartered, but I do know that they are Merkins. "Thank you" rather than "fuck you" is their basic going in approach.

They may be the big bad bully of the coffee world, but they do understand customer service and quality.

A perfect example of this came today; I went to Uxbridge Starbucks as usual and ordered my coffee and a "luxury" fruit loaf. The coffee, as usual, appeared in an instant and was very agreeable. The plastic cup of water appeared right on time and was cold (as it should be) but there was a problem with heating up the fruit loaf as one of the divs had forgotten to turn the machine on.

In Costa, this would have been a calamity resulting in me having the stand there and help the thicko lawyers run their own bloody coffee shop, in Starbucks, here is what happened.

Starbucks Div: (remembering of course that I don't speak Bosnian, so I can't catch a bloody word he is saying) The machine has not been turned on, your fruit loaf will be a few minutes, take a seat and I will bring it to you.

Peter: Fine.

I took my seat and started on my coffee, and to read my paper.

A few minutes later the Bosnian appeared with my fruit loaf and a ticket for a free coffee to compensate for the delay. He did say something but it was in Bosnian (so of course I didn't understand it) but the gesture was much appreciated!

So the real difference between Costa and Starbucks: Costa think the customer is a major inconvenience and their lives would be improved immeasurably if we all buggered off, Starbucks loves their customer and recognises that we pay their wages.

It bothers me to say this but it is one nil to the Merkins.