Why here in England, we are average at most sports (at international level).

Watching the Spaniards take the poor old craic merchants apart at football last night, I got to thinking why it is (prompted by a question from my wife along the same lines - though she put it down to the warm weather), why Johnny Spaniard was so bloody good at football.

My flippant remark was that having spent loads of money they never had in the first place and in a nation that sleeps all afternoon and eats a five hour long dinner afterwards, they have not much else to do and therefore bloody well ought to be good at it.

That got me thinking a lot more, which is always dangerous anyway, but I think there is a strain of truth in this.

Think of the games at which England fields an international team (and I mean England and not the provincials as they do not sing the British National anthem and always root for the other side when up against England), and the list is long. Cricket, football, rugby, darts, snooker, hockey, running, jumping, swimming, rowing, horse riding etc. The list is endless.

Then think, in sporting terms at least, what a minuscule pool of people from which we can choose, as obviously the provincials are out on account of the national anthem issue. Then there is the fact that a good number of English people are fat racists and thus only good at darts.

And then think, maybe at this moment, particularly of Spain after their wonderful performance last night, what else apart from spending money they don't have, sleeping all afternoon, five hour dinners and football do they do? Nothing, that's what. So as I originally thought, but only in passing, they bloody well ought to be good at it.

So after this year's Olympics have finished, I shall be making a suggestion to the sporting authorities here in England that we trim the list down.

We have to keep darts to keep the fat racists off the street, but let's focus on just four sports and be good at them.

This way England will prove to be world champions at something other than just Formula One (car building, drivers and teams).